How are you really? Do you ever stop to ask yourself that question? Or like most people, do you sometimes drift into a state of gradually increasing anxiety or low-level depression? By Linda Kavelin-Popov.

A sign outside a church said, “Too blessed to be stressed.” It seems to me that the opposite is also true. Sometimes we’re just too stressed to feel blessed. It’s like being under a sky thick with clouds. Even though the sun continues to shine brightly, when our sense of wellbeing is clouded, we can’t see the light. Experiencing times like this is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s something to pay attention to. It can enrich us, develop our compassion and strengthen our resilience. Pausing to reflect on how you are – body, mind and spirit – is an essential mental health practice.

Consider reflecting on these questions: 1. How are you really? 2. What stresses you? What brings you down or drains you? 3. On a scale from 1 to 10, how stressed are you? What is stressing you? 3. What blesses you? What sustains you? How often do you spend time and energy in ways that bring you joy? 4. How do you handle your tests and trials? Do you isolate? Numb yourself and self-medicate with drugs, alcohol, or another addiction? Do you take your anger out on your family or friends? Or do you reach out for help? 4. Are you doing anything to help others? Are you being of service through your work or the way you choose to spend your time? Do you have a sense of purpose? Journaling these questions can give you a snapshot of the state of your mental health and wellbeing.

Knowledge is power and when you understand yourself better, it frees you to take positive action. We cannot control the circumstances in our lives, but we have far more control than we know over our response to those circumstances.

Viktor Frankl was a psychiatrist who was sent to the Nazi concentration camps. Despite horrendous suffering, he held steadfastly to his belief that “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedom – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” When our mental health and wellbeing are shaky, we can choose our attitude and our actions. We can seek the teachable moment in the test, realising we are not victims but athletes.

God gives us trials and hardships not to make us weak but to strengthen us. We can have compassion for ourselves rather than pushing ourselves to “just get over it.” We can call on friends or family to support us. We can ask for professional help. There is no shame in doing so! Remember that from the agitation of the oyster comes a pearl.

Dieter Uchtdorf, a president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints said, “It’s your reaction to adversity, not adversity itself, that determines how your life’s story will develop.” The Qur’an (94:5) says: “Indeed with every hardship there is relief.” So, if you’re feeling low, don’t just try to turn that smile upside down. Listen deeply to your own story, seek the pearls of truth about what you need to learn, and be assured that, as Psalm 30:5 says, “Weeping may endure for a night but joy cometh in the morning.”