Virtues in Paradise: Seven virtues of happiness

“Don’t worry, be happy,” sings Bob Marley. There is profound truth in this. Even in the midst of a deeply troubled world, we have more power than we know to sustain our wellbeing and happiness, writes Linda Kavelin-Popov.

We are agents of our own joy. Here are seven virtues that increase inner peace when you choose to practice them. 

1. Acceptance: Accept the things in your life you cannot change rather than spending energy fighting against them. Accepting your loved ones for their basic “suchness” rather than trying to change them is essential to happy relationships. Don’t be a critic. Be an appreciator.
2. Faith: Have faith that no matter what happens in your life, you are not alone. Grace is with you, watching over you. “As your faith is, so shall your powers and blessings be.” Baha’i Teachings; Jesus said “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you.” (Luke 17:6)

An honoured man I knew talked about “yoyo prayer,” when you give your troubles to God, then keep taking them back.

• Detachment: The ability to step back and reflect before acting when someone hurts or betrays you. That’s about them, not about you. You are worthy of trustworthy love. Don’t let others determine your self-worth.
• Gratitude: This is the best antidote to sorrow and anxiety. Consciously count your blessings, dwelling on the many graces of each day. Slow down and notice the beauty in your life and around you. Focus on the good things. Your friends, your health, a possession you love, time for rest. Take one day off from worry, by continually refocusing on the good things of your life.
• Humility: Ask for help when you need it. If you are suffering, have compassion for yourself and take the time to grieve. Find a counsellor or companion you trust and open your heart to them. This clears the way for fresh joys.
• Creativity: Tap the unique gifts God has given you. Actively pursue activities that give you joy. “Let us each use the gifts allotted to us by God’s grace.” (Romans 12:6)
• Love: Spread love wherever you go. Do what you love and love what you do. A farmer friend of mine talks to his plants and vegetables. He loves them and they thrive. Sufi poet and mystic Rumi said, “Let the beauty we love be what we do. There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.”

Here is a bonus virtue - Service: Doing something to serve others, including your regular work gives you a sense of meaning and purpose. Research shows that it is a key to healing depression. I was once deeply depressed by a major change – a move, a temporary separation from my children, loss of a job I loved and living with people I didn’t know who had no heat in their house other than in the kitchen. I gained 20 pounds and didn’t even recognise myself in the mirror. At a faith meeting, I learned of a group of refugees who needed help. Serving them brought me back to myself.

Can you imagine practicing all these virtues? You’ll be too blessed to be stressed.