Virtues in Paradise: How are you, really?

How is it possible that here in Paradise, those who live here miss out on many of the treasures that bring thousands of tourists each year to these shores, craving the beauty and gifts that are all around us? writes Linda Kavelin-Popov.

Do you ever ask yourself, “How are you, really?” and consider designing your life to have more spaciousness, more time for you to pursue what gives you joy, to care for your body and nurture your soul? It’s what I call a pace of Grace. When I asked a friend and co-worker how her Christmas holiday was, she laughed and said, “What holiday?” She had visiting relatives to cook for and a plantation to tend, a wedding to help with, and was just as busy as before she took her Christmas break from her job. Most Cook Islanders value hard work. They are accustomed to working all the time – tending the land, tending the children, serving the church, cooking for all kinds of events and ceremonies, making costumes. Most people here, if you ask “Pe’ea koi?” (How are you?) automatically answer “Meitaki.” (Good) When I ask them “How are you, really?” they inevitably say, “busy!!” I find myself falling into the habit of being “too busy” and putting the simple restorative joys of island life on the bottom of my priority list. As I reflected for the New Year and gave an online workshop to help people look back at the Teachable Moments and blessings of 2023 and discern the life they wanted to create in 2024, it impacted me as well. It was called “Rich from the Journey.” I’ll share a bit of it here. Take a moment to reflect on the past year, and ask yourself, “What has been my Teachable Moment? What test did life bring? What did I learn from it? What virtue do I need to practice more? What was one of my greatest blessings, one that I am most thankful for? What gave me joy? What nurtured me, heart, mind and soul? If there was nothing, how do I bring more joy into my life? Sufi mystic, Jalal’u’din Rumi said, “Let the beauty we love be what we do. There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.” There are so many ways to serve our families, our communities, our Lord. Give yourself permission to ask, am I having any fun? Do I spend “me” time to restore myself? A friend makes sure to have lunch with one of her close friends a couple of times a week. She also found a church that enlivens her more than the one she was attending. If we are happy and our own cup is full, it overflows to others.

I looked at what are my yeses in 2024, in order to have more influence and leadership over my own time. I made a commitment to live the beautiful life that is here in Paradise, rather than go from task to task. I reestablished a deeper routine of reverence, including daily meditation, not just quick devotions each morning squeezed into the day before I do the “real” work. I started swimming more often and spending time with friends who feed my soul. Joy is uplifted in all scriptures. So let us “make a joyful noise unto the Lord,” and fill our cup to overflowing.