Your mum does everything for your family, this year make sure she gets more than one present, writes Ruta Mave.

Xmas morning YouTube parody – the kids run in and jump on mum and dad’s bed yelling “lets open our presents”. The son, daughter and dad show their present and say “I got a nerf gun, I got a hat, I got an autographed baseball bat”.

Then the mum says “I got a robe.” They continue for another four verses showing their presents “I got telescope, I got a globe, I got a watch” and Mum repeats “and I got a robe”. As the presents get larger and more expensive, mum announces she is going to make breakfast in her new robe while removing the sale sticker from it.  

They open their Santa sock and everyone has gifts inside except mum, hers is empty. “But wait”, they cry “there are more presents are under the tree… for the dog. He got a bone and a squeaky toy because he deserves it”, they sing “and he got a robe”.

The video ends with mum exhausted from being up until 4am wrapping presents. With no makeup on she looks dishevelled in the family photo. Finally, she sits down amongst the mess of paper while the family disappear to play with their gifts. The voice over says “Your mum does everything for your family, this year make sure she gets more than one present”.

Mum’s make Xmas happen. It’s like working two full time jobs trying to buy for everyone not just anything but buy the one-thing each person will like.  Unfortunately, if she is like me, she found that one thing in July and put it somewhere safe for Xmas, then promptly forgot she had and when she finds another perfect thing for someone, she buys hides and forgets again. By the time Xmas comes there are presents hidden everywhere, when she finds them all, she realises she has bought too many for one person and not their sibling. Now she has to go and even up the number of presents. Trying to buy the perfect present for whomever that won’t be immediately returned the next day to swap for a completely different genre of gift, is like predicting the stock market accurately.

When the person likes, nods, accepts and starts to use it or put it in their room carefully, is like winning lotto or buying stocks at the low time and cashing in at its peak just before it crashes. These are real-time emotions and measurable body indicators that produce mile-wide smiles, self-congratulations and a feeling of powerful awesomeness that make the insanity of preparing for the single day of Xmas worth the hassle and hangover.

It’s now limbo time, the days between the Xmas statutory holidays and the next weekend and holidays of the new year. Where mum’s, dad’s and everyone with significant others in their lives, to buy for, hang out with or visit for days of eating and drinking in the sun.

The credit card is maxed out, the stomach fed up and the brain fried and it isn’t the end of the year yet. Some of you have to go back to work or finish some report. Some of you realise you only have three-four days left to complete your 2023 New Year’s resolutions of being more active, get a promotion or lose 5 kilograms, before the bell rings and you have to re-set your goals, dreams and future pathways for 2024.

This is the time of justification where we make up glorious arguably sound logical reasons why we didn’t achieve those goals, dreams and pathways we set for ourselves for 2023. The fantastic thing about New Year’s resolutions is you can hit the reset button every December 31^st and try again the following year. The problem with this is like recycling the same wrapping gift bag for presents year after year; they eventually get tired looking and out of date.

The person you became this year is different from your 2022 model and so the 2023 goals may not be relevant for your 2024 you are going to become.

It’s time for mums to start giving some thought and attention to ourselves. This is a rare time we may take to think about ourselves and wish and dream of that sunny day we can be higher on the priority line. Mothers, grandmothers, aunties don’t wait until the kids leave or you win lotto, do it now, choose to look after yourself first like the airlines tell us – “You must put on your own oxygen mask first, before helping others.”

When you can breathe deep and calmly then you are better able to help others breathe deep too, it determines everyone’s survival.

When setting your goals on Sunday for 2024, don’t say ‘I’ll try’. Listen to Yoda when he told Luke Skywalker “Don’t try – do!”.