Women’s day is not to be confused with Mothers’ Day. This is not a time to celebrate what label we are but who we are, writes Ruth Mave.

Helen Reddy sang- We are women hear us roar growing in numbers too big to ignore, from ‘wisdom born of pain from paying a price’ but learning from what was gained. She coined the phrase ‘Women can do anything - I am strong, I am invincible, I am woman.’

Feminism isn’t about making women strong. Women are already strong. It’s about changing the way the world perceives their strength.  One way to find out the strength of a woman is to drop her into hot water, invariably she will grow and build a platform to stand on from the very bricks that were thrown at her.

The problem with most women's problems is they’re often seen, narrated and determined by men. The predisposition of men feeling they are experts on women’s issues is why we have so many male gynecologists. Similarly, past recollections of events are viewed through a male lens, so when a Viking archaeological dig uncovered a burial site of an important War Lord complete with horses and servants for the afterlife, it was assumed to be a man. A woman discovered and revealed the bones' DNA belonged to a female Viking leader. The program Vikings rightfully portrays a strong forceful female leader, among the many tribes in conflict. The Game of Thrones series showed Women were equally deviant and evil as their male counterparts, and in some instances more so.  The leadership of Cleopatra, Joan of Arc, Catherine the Great, Queen Elizabeth 1, and Victoria are fraught with intrigue and war, so how did women come to be portrayed so meek and mild in modern times?

Granted muscle to muscle women are the softer sex, have more emotive drivers, think less selfishly, but so far as pain threshold goes, Women’s is 9x higher than men. Most men wouldn’t last a day with a 4kg slam ball strapped to their belly let alone having to push it out of their rectum 9 months later.

Now with equality thrown at them, women not only have to birth the child, raise the child, but also go to work and pay for the child while living with a man who acts like a child. Women do not marry so they can become his mother substitute, there to support, provide and nurture his ego.  Women are not his rehab, nor is she his bank, his maid or his minion. In order to keep growing strong women we have to stop telling them Disney fairytales of being rescued. The Cinderella rags to riches reality is a man who sweeps you off your feet is more likely a janitor.

The more you tell a strong woman she can’t do something the more she will go out and do it. It’s this temperament men find most confusing especially in arguments. If a woman is arguing with you then it means she sees you as a worthy opponent, one she wants to have to understand her.  The moment she stops arguing is when she is done, and no longer thinks you are worth it.

To understand strong women, men take heed of the following points a woman says during an argument.

Fine – Is used to end an argument when she knows she’s right and you need to shut up. The speed at which a woman says “I’m fine” is directly proportional to the severity of the shit storm that’s about to follow. The word scale goes from great, good, okay, not okay, I hate you, then FINE.                     

 Nothing – means something and you need to be worried.                                                                          

 Go Ahead- is a Dare, not permission. Don’t do it!                                                                                   

 Whatever – is a woman’s way of saying screw you.  When a woman says “do whatever you want”- it means don’t do whatever you want.

That’s okay – She is thinking long and hard on how and when you will pay for your mistake.        

Wow! – This is not a compliment. She is amazed that one person could be so stupid.  If you are arguing with a woman and she says Wow!  Run.                                                                                    

Laughing – When a woman starts laughing during an argument, please know the psycho part of her brain has been activated – Abort Mission, Run

Let’s celebrate the uniqueness of women, their strengths and vulnerabilities and recognize these are the very traits we need in the world to create balance and worth in our world. Women are not lesser than men, they are capable of achieving as much as men, only they do it in high heels.

Bob Marley said if she’s amazing, she won’t be easy, if she’s easy, she won’t be amazing. If she is worth it, you won’t give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy.