Cook Islands men’s counselling centre Te Punanga Ora’anga Matutu (TePOM) is looking at another year of growth and aims to support more men and women through counselling and support services.

TePOM coordinator Rick Currie said that lately, they have started seeing more clients where both men and women are seeking support as they navigate a difficult and often dark time in their lives.

Currie said these difficulties are generally centred on increased alcohol consumption, end of year stress, unresolved issues, lack of money and the increased cost of living.

He said other difficulties are unresolved family issues, which are often highlighted by family gatherings over the festive season, struggles with dealing with children who are spending more time at home due to the school holidays, the increased number of events over the festive season that have been put off until families gather during this time and the associated contributions to those events.

“These are also a rich breeding ground for family/domestic violence to happen as parts, or all of the above, can be and often are contributors,” Currie said.

“To help combat this, one of TePOM’s goals this year is to reach out to as many people as we can through awareness workshops that focus on ways to grow and maintain healthy relationships, how to live an abuse and violence free lifestyle and of high importance is finding and training community Champions that are a first port of call when people need support.”

Currie said they will be also working to strengthen their external relationship with stakeholders and the community.

“We are firm believers that it takes a community working together to achieve a safe environment for all vulnerable people,” he said.

“Added to this focus is the safety and wellbeing of our children and how as parents/caregivers we can help facilitate that process by coming along to our training.”

This year, in addition to the anger management programme and general counselling which TePOM is already running, they are looking at starting their recently developed Tu Maru wellbeing and personal development programme for men, women and couples of all ages.

Currie says the programme runs over six (6) sessions and is designed to enrich the lives of those attending the programme as well as their family and friends.

TePOM is looking to start training the facilitators to run the programmes they are currently delivering to help with the growing demand for their service.

Currie reiterated that domestic violence is a serious issue and it’s important to seek professional help if you or someone you know is experiencing it.

“Many couples experience challenges and seeking professional help is a sign of strength, not weakness.”

Some useful factors to consider include:

 i) Being open and honest with each other by sharing your feelings and concerns, not blaming and criticising your partner, can address problems right from the beginning.

ii) focus on solutions by working together to find the solution that works for both, of course it will require listening to each other, compromising and a willingness to make the change.

iii) set realistic expectations – it will take time to change, and to understand how the process works, also be patient and committed to it – enjoy the journey, don’t rush in expecting miracles or changes to happen right away.

iv) Apply the tools and techniques that you have learned in therapy or counselling to your everyday life. It can bring about positive changes and in the long run should strengthen your relationship if and when you do apply the new learning.

v) Learning to express your needs and feelings clearly and respectfully is also important at the same time try to understand your partner's side of the story.

Currie added that there are more factors to consider but urges the public, “if you need help, please reach out to TePOM on phone 51622, and we are ready to support you on your journey.”