Women could teach our leader a thing or two about parliament

Monday March 06, 2017 Published in Smoke Signals

The women’s conference to be held at Parliament later this week, ought to consider extending an invitation to PM Henry Puna, a smoke signaler says.

“He should do this for a number of reasons: 1) he might actually learn something about parliamentary protocol from the women delegates; 2) He could actually get some good ideas about how this country ought to be run, and what is missing in the current situation, including  himself, as he is seldom in country; 3) as he is so seldom in the country, let alone inside the House, it would be a good opportunity to reacquaint himself with the House layout, and also where his seat is located, as he certainly seems to have lost his way when it comes to running the country, and appears only to know where the business class lounges are located in so many airports around the world.


“Good on Tapi Taio for speaking his mind,” a smoke signaler writes. “As the owner of the ship in question he is surely in a good position to make an educated guess as to the contributing factors to the grounding. Given that the Northern Group are the happy hunting ground of the foreign fishing boats in our EEZ it is not unlikely that his theory will be proved correct. The investigation team includes Marine Resources and an insurance official and it will be interesting to see what their findings will be.”


“All my lemons keep getting stolen and I remembered the smoke signals from someone else about their lemons as well,” a smoke signaler says. “There are so many thieves on this island who lack the decency to ask before they take something that is growing on private property! I’m sick and tired of it happening. It’s been months now and I’ve honestly only had about five lemons from my tree because that was all I could find. Anger ensues!”


It seems lemon-stealing is prolific on the island. Another smoke signaler says, “We have a large tree on our private property in Arorangi which has borne plenty of fruit. But do we get to make lemonade from them? No! I am tired of seeing plenty of unripe lemons on my tree one day, and then none the next day! The polite thing to do is ask if you can take some (not all!) of our lemons. You thieves, I ought to tie my dogs up to the tree for them to bark at you the next time you try to take what isn’t yours.”

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